Recently Jada Pinkett Smith has come under scrutiny for seemingly promoting her and Will Smith as having an “open marriage”. Jada has repeatedly denied that this is what she has said, but in all her efforts to clear up the confusion it has only lead to more questions. The truth is Jada and Will Smith have been married for nearly 16 years and are in the process of raising three children while navigating their own successful careers in Hollywood. Regardless of how they define the perimeters of their relationship it seems to be working for them. Here in her own words is how Jada views her relationship with Will….
“Will and I BOTH can do WHATEVER we want, because we TRUST each other to do so. This does NOT mean we have an open relationship…this means we have a GROWN one.”
As a newly engaged woman I’ve been thinking a lot about the roles of husband and wife and what kind of marriage I wish to strive towards. After almost seven years together we certainly have had trials, tribulations and bouts with trust. As we move towards making our bond more concrete I don’t want to hold on to archaic notions of love and marriage. I want us to define our commitment based on accepting who we each are wholeheartedly. I want there to be room for growth individually and together. I want to be the best wife I can be knowing my future husband is committed to being the best husband he can be while allowing for faults and disappointments along the way.
Perhaps what Jada is saying is people are human, and no matter what your intentions, they are gonna do what they’re gonna do. When you reach a certain age you tend to look at relationships with clearer eyes based more on reality than romance. If you encourage the man in your life to be the best person they can be, you hope they will bring that better self to the table as a father and husband. People make mistakes and they do disappoint, but only you know the strength of the foundation you’ve built your marriage upon. My personal goal right now is to set up the strongest foundation with the biggest rocks of faith, courage, friendship, love and forgiveness I can find so we know we can withstand any tests that may come. I suspect that’s what Jada is getting at when she says they don’t have an open relationship, they have a grown one!